Kenapa Orang Tua di Indonesia Lebih Banyak Takut?

Setelah mendadak pindah ke Jepang dengan segala keterbatasan dan perubahan rencana dari menetap hanya untuk tiga bulan menjadi tidak terdefinisi, ternyata banyak juga hal yang bisa dipelajari. Walaupun awalnya nampak serba tidak pasti, pada akhirnya toh bisa juga dijalani. Dari mulai kembali duduk di bangku kuliah (atau eksperimen di bench?) sampai akhirnya memutuskan untuk melanjutkan studi ke bidang yang sama sekali baru, akhirnya sampai juga di titik ini.

Look how far we have come! (patting my self on the back).

Anyway, I was writing an impressions note for a class I took this semester on Child Health Sciences when it hit me. I think I understand (a little) why Indonesian parents worry so much; don't run, don't climb, don't eat dirt, don't to this and that..

But before I explain why, let's read the aforementioned impressions note to get the right context:

In retrospect, I enjoy all sessions of Child Health Sciences course because of how multidisciplinary and well-rounded the materials taught here on what health is defined in children. Through this class, I am amazed to discover how important family nurture and environmental influences are in child mental development. It is true that a healthy child must have a healthy body in the first place, but we can only do so much to dictate nature. There is always possibility of neurodiversity or genetic abnormality that happen de novo—randomly— no matter how careful we are with the planning, pregnancy, and delivery process that will give birth to a baby without the image of what a healthy child should be. But the importance does not lie there. From this class I can confer that a healthy child may not always have a perfect physiological or genetics make up, but a healthy child is always raised in a healthy environment with adequate support psychologically, physically, and emotionally. This idea come from the fact that I learned in this course, which is: a child born with a perfectly healthy body can easily be the victim of abusive parenting or domestic violence, destroying their chance of growing into a healthy individual because epigenetic change is a scientifically proven phenomenon (as well as its reversal). Meanwhile, a child with neurodiversity and genetic abnormalities can live a happy and meaningful life with the right nurturing and adequate support—in another words, they can be achieving things in life like any healthy children may be capable of.

Securing the adequate support and right nurturing for every child health is indeed not an easy task. This needs the involvement of parents, community, and the government to establish an ecosystem where children will develop to their utmost potential. In summary, I learn that a healthy child comes from healthy parents of a healthy family living in a healthy community of a healthy country. 

 

It is pretty clear that Indonesian parents (now, I hope only now) are lacking support from their community, let alone from the government. Thus, they are worried that one wrong move will make their children's life completely go south. I am not saying that the ecosystem in Japan is the best for raising children (trust me, Indonesia is much better in some departments), but I do feel more carefree and confident raising a kid here because for example, I know that if an accident in the park happen, I can easily access healthcare services as quick response ambulance lift is covered in the universal health care scheme. And that is the first step of ensuring the development of healthy children. I am so relieved to see that many parents in Indonesia put more effort in making sure that they are doing parenting right, but it is not enough. A structural effort to guarantee health for children is crucial.

I wrote this essay six years ago for a final assignment in a class I took at FSRD ITB (Mind you that I was not enrolled as student in this faculty, I was one of the SITH people). I stumbled upon this essay today, and I am very grateful that I did (and surprised that I can actually write a complete composition in Bahasa Indonesia!). 

This essay is a sound reminder of who I am and what I am destined to be in life. I pasted it as it is with the original heading and highlighted the important lines. I sincerely hope anyone reading can find this reinvigorating. 

Ujian Akhir Semester

Psikologi Seni (SR4204)

Dr. Irma Damajanti, M.Sn. Ardhana Riswarie, MA. Putri Fidhini, S.Sn.

ESSAY APRESIASI KARYA SENI

oleh

Siti Nurul Zhahara 

10612048

Fakultas Seni Rupa dan Desain Institut Teknologi Bandung 2016

ASMUDJO J. IRIANTO
“Untitled”
240 x 60 x 430 cm
WIREMESH WITH TAR, RESIN FIBERGLASS, FOUND OBJECTS, BOOKS 2016
GALERI NASIONAL INDONESIA
MANIFESTO V : ARUS

Ini adalah kali pertama saya pergi ke galeri seni dengan sengaja. Dari pengalaman yang baru ini, saya menemukan satu karya yang menarik perhatian saya lebih dari pada karya lainnya yang dipamerkan dalam pagelaran seni di Galeri Seni Nasional yang saya kunjungi. Sebuah karya dari Asmudjo J. Irianto, berhasil membuat saya terdiam untuk beberapa saat agar saya dapat mengamati dan akhirnya menikmati karyanya yang bertajuk “Untitled”.

Karya seni tersebut terlihat seperti gabungan karya seni patung dan instalasi objek lainnya yang dapat ditemukan sehari-hari. Hal yang mencolok dari karya ini adalah tumpukan buku menjulang hingga menyentuh ke langit-langit ruangan, terletak tepat di atas kepala patung yang berdiri tegak di atas seekor kuda hitam yang memakai sepatu roda di keempat tapal kakinya. Hal ini menarik karena terdapat hubungan yang sangat erat dari ketiga keadaan tersebut, yakni keadaan statis dari ketiga kombinasi tersebut memang terlahir dari posisi tiga hal itu sendiri. Selain itu, ada beberapa objek yang dijinjing oleh patung, yaitu tas kerja, sandal jepit, dan ember besi. Ketiga objek ini nampaknya memiliki arti simbolisme tersendiri yang ingin disampaikan oleh senimannya, begitu juga warna patung yang putih bersih yang terlihat sangat kontras dengan kuda hitam legam yang ia pijaki. Pada bagian belakang kuda, tepat di bawah ekornya, terdapat ember besi lain. Berbeda dengan ember yang dijinjing oleh patung, ember di bawah kuda ini berisi beberapa kuas lukis. Kebanyakan objek yang terdapat dalam karya ini merupakan benda-benda yang umum dijumpai pada keseharian. Merujuk ke hasil tinjauan pustaka mengenai seniman yang membuatnya, kebanyakan elemen pada karya ini dapat pula dijumpai dalam karya-karya lainnya milik seniman yang sama. Artinya objek-objek yang ditata ini adalah suatu icon atau kekhasan tersendiri dari senimannya. Selain itu, keseluruhan hasil karya ini menciptakan bayangan yang begitu unik pada dinding ruang pameran.

Hal yang pertama kali menarik perhatian saya dari karya ini adalah tumpukan buku yang berada di atas kepala patung. Saya takjub dengan dua hal mengenai detil ini. Pertama, saya takjub karena penataan yang sedemikian rupa sehingga memungkinkan sebanyak itu buku untuk tegar menjulang di atas kepala patung. Untuk seorang awam yang tidak memiliki keterampilan seni seperti saya, hal ini tentu menarik perhatian. Kedua, saya berusaha mengidentifikasi setiap judul buku yang dimiliki oleh masing-masing buku pada tumpukan tersebut. Saya sangat kagum karena ada banyak sekali judul buku nyata dari berbagai disiplin ilmu .Kemudian saya habiskan beberapa menit untuk mengamati detil dari setiap karya ini hingga saya menyadari bahwa kuda yang dipijak oleh patung memakai sepatu roda di keempat kakinya. Di titik ini lah saya menemukan hubungan yang telah sebelumnya saya ceritakan. Kuda hitam dapat dengan mudah bergeser tempat karena roda pada tapalnya. Karena hal ini, patung yang menggambarkan seorang manusia itu dapat pula terjatuh dari pijakannya bersamaan dengan kuda yang bergeser karena roda-roda di kakinya. Namun, karena tumpukan buku di atas kepala patung manusia cukup tinggi dan kokoh untuk mencapai langit-langit, maka keadaan statis pun dicapai oleh patung manusia dan juga kuda. Saya melihat hubungan ini dan seketika banyak sekali versi cerita yang terbentuk di pikiran saya. Terlepas dari pesan asli yang ingin disampaikan oleh senimannya serta mengingat kembali bahwa mengapresiasi karya seni pada akhirnya bukanlah untuk menilai karya itu, melainkan untuk mengenal diri sendiri, maka bagi saya cerita yang paling saya sukai adalah tentang bagaimana pengetahuan, yang diwakili oleh tumpukan buku, dapat meningkatkan martabat manusia dan dalam waktu yang sama mempertahankan kondisi agar tidak goyah. Kuda hitam yang memakai tapal roda bagi saya terlihat seperti lambang dari yang ketidakberpendirian, mudahnya terjadi pergeseran dan ketidakstabilan. Kenyataan bahwa kuda adalah hewan, terasa seperti perasaan tidak adanya kebebasan dan eksploitasi yang dialami oleh hewan, terutama kuda yang seringkali menjadi salah satunya. Di atas hewan, ada manusia yang dianggap lebih tinggi merujuk kepada posisi patung manusia yang diletakkan di atas punggung kuda, memijaknya. Tanpa buku di atas kepalanya, manusia mungkin masih tetap bisa berada di atas kuda. Namun, sudah pasti kedudukannya tidak akan statis. Dengan adanya tumpukan buku, atau dalam konteks ini saya pandang sebagai berbagai ilmu pengetahuan bagi manusia yang pada akhirnya menjadikan manusia bijaksana, dapat menjaga posisi manusia dan juga kuda sehingga tidak terombang-ambing. Bagi saya, pesan yang tertangkap adalah bahwa ilmu pengetahuan dan kebijaksanaan dapat menopang manusia tegak berdiri di atas kondisi alami manusia yaitu kebimbangan dan ketidaktahuannya sehingga ia dapat mengontrol keadaan di sekitarnya agar tetap tenang dan berada lebih tinggi dari sekedar objek yang dieksploitasi. Sandal jepit dan ember serta tas kerja yang dibawa oleh patung manusia mendemonstrasikan beberapa hal yang dilakukan oleh manusia, seperti bekerja, belajar, berjalan, dan tanggung jawab lainnya yang harus dijalani dan dipertanggungjawabkan oleh manusia. Posisi patung yang menghadap arah berlawanan dengan kepala kuda saya lihat sebagai penekanan terhadap kontras antara patung manusia dan kuda hitam yang dipijakinya, sama seperti pemilihan warna yang kontras untuk keduanya. Ember besi di belakang kuda merupakan hasil akhir dari semua elemen yang telah disebutkan. Hasil akhir ini

diwakili oleh kuas yang menurut saya erat kaitannya dengan seni, atau pada akhirnya saya mengartikannya menjadi the way we live our lives are eventually different arts which are unique from one another.

Melihat karya ini saya merasa terpukau, menjadi bersemangat, tergugah untuk terus belajar dan memahami hingga akhirnya mencapai tahap kebijaksanaan. Saya juga menyadari bahwa terkadang sekumpulan objek sehari-hari yang disusun sedemikian rupa dapat menyampaikan suatu makna yang dalam, tentu saja tergantung kepada seberapa jauh kita bersedia menangkap pesan itu dan memahaminya. Walau demikian, saya mengaku tetap merasa sedikit bingung dan penasaran dengan apa yang sebenernya ingin disampaikan oleh senimannya melalui karya ini. Apakah sama pemikirannya dengan apa yang saya tangkap, ataukah sesuatu hal lain yang mungkin sangat bertolak belakang dengan apresiasi yang saya tuangkan. Apapun jawabannya, mungkin inilah yang disebut memberikan ruang pada kreasi, yaitu untuk meninggalkan misteri sehingga pada akhirnya dapat menjadi motivasi untuk menciptakan seni saya sendiri.

2013 to 2020 (Tokyo)

I've traveled to these places years ago;

The magnificent Shibuya crossing, the lively Omotesando, and the romantic Odaiba.

It was among the best times of my life.

And now, fate brings me--no, us-- here again.

I am not trying to replace the memories, nor erasing them. I consider it as writing a new chapter, with new characters and stories to tell. And yet, the places remain the same. 

It is the magnificent Shibuya crossing, the lively Omotesando, and the romantic Odaiba. 

There are places I'll remember
All my life, though some have changed
Some forever, not for better
Some have gone, and some remain
All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends, I still can recall
Some are dead, and some are living
In my life, I've loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers
There is no one compares with you
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new

Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life, I love you more

To the ones whose love I cherish every second of my life.

 Ayah dan Ibu--Sydney, July 2017. After 30+ years of wonderful marriage.

Two people who have years of wonderful marriage to come.

True love does not fall from a tree.

It is years of sacrifices,

of heartache turn into lost soul

consumed by hatred

and regrets.

True love is not as simple as a kiss.

it never exist—

until years of sacrifices,

of heartache turn into lost soul

consumed by hatred

and regrets, and all of it

fades away by its own,

just right when the true love itself

come to exist.

Kalau Ada yang Harus Dibagi

As we think about it, to reach a certain point of stability, atom needs to eliminate its electron and transfer it to another atom that needs it to stabilize itself. Or else, They share the electrons--they use it together at the same time. This is an evidence of a fundamental concept of sharing. God has applied this concept even to the smallest unit of world's matters and of life. Thus, It will be a shame for human if they do not apply this concept in their lives. Shame, shame on you people.

Then I thought, if there is something that must be eliminated from me, or at least shared from my life, what should it be?

We might think the answer is the materials like money, gold or diamonds. But surely it is misleading and makes us forget about the simple things. It appears that The peace of mind, and the stability of it, often can be acquired by simply putting a dash of love to our lives. I believe that all of the creatures in this world need to be loved, to be cared at least a moment everyday. 

Let's take a look at the tree which recently had its flowers bloomed. It wants to be cared about--to have its beautiful yellow flowers to be seen and appreciated by the people who walk, passing it by everyday who ironically often do not realize the wonderful changes that happens to itself. The tree will be delighted if there are people stopping by to admire it for at least 10 seconds--to perceive the beauty of the flowers the tree had just bloomed this morning. It will make the tree delighted because it proves some compassion-- that we care about it, that we are not just passing it by.

In this case, human also needs compassion. It has been the nature of human to demand something like that. But often times people forget that they do not always share the compassion together. They do not always love each other at the same time. Just like the atoms, there are some which are stabilized by sharing electrons with other atoms while some others are stabilized from eliminating or transferring its electrons. Atoms that become stable from eliminating its electron are not harmed by losing something from itself, on the other hand it has got something for its benefit and at the very same time are helping another atoms who are lack of electrons to reach their stability. So both parties are satisfied.

We can use this analogy on human life.

Sometimes, we have to give away the compassion--the love, rather than sharing it. So, if there should be love taken away from us, perhaps it is what we actually need--to have something eliminated from ourselves, thus we will become stabilized. The other 'atom' who steal our 'transferred love' maybe in a greater need of it than our own self. It will be more useful for them, because it stabilize them. And it is not its fault for being unable to give anything in return-- it is lack of love from the very first place and that is why it steals away the love from us to stabilize itself. Thus, it makes all of the sense in the world that it will never be able to give anything in return. Be proud of yourself that you can sincerely giving away 'electrons' to them. It should not be a great loss for us since perhaps we are in need of eliminating it from ourselves so we can proceed with lighter step, to be better stabilized.

Let them keep the compassion, the love you have done to them. Because probably, that is what yourself need..to give away things that you have abundantly and let the other who is lack of it to earn it from you. Therefore, both of you will acquire the stability. 

The most important point is to not refrain from it. Simply be grateful that it happens to you--that eventually no harm is done, right?

Do not be blue, the world is fair to you. Not everyone can live their whole lives like that. For them, there must be other atom that will share its electrons--two atoms will share electrons and use it together at the same time-- two people who love each other at the same time, sharing compassion. So we have to find that atom like us and share the electrons--the compassion-- to reach stability together. Along the journey to find that atom, it is not a bad idea either to give away what we have now since we will never find out if that atom will steal away our electrons or if it will stick with us and share the electrons together at the same time.

The point is,

spend at least 10 seconds of your 24 hours in a day to admire and perceive the beauty all around you that God has carefully and perfectly crafted for you to appreciate.

Cheerio!

Nat King Cole's

Nat King Cole has always been one of my favorites.

I want to share this one song, 

Love is a many-splendored thing,
It's the April rose that only grows in the early spring,
Love is nature's way of giving a reason to be living,
The golden crown that makes a man a king.
Lost on a high and windy hill,
In the morning mist two lovers kissed and the world stood still,
When our fingers touch my silent heart has taught us how to sing,
Yes, true love's a many-splendored thing.

Love is a many Splendored thing-Nat King Cole

Childhood House Memory

Jalan Asahan 2C

Laladon Indah, Bogor

Kita pindah-pindah, katanya karena It is the nature of human to be dynamic. To once in a while move to the other points.